2017 EU Captains Report.

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2017 EU Captains Report.

Postby greenwoo » Mon May 29, 2017 11:17 am

Captains Log.......ah more of that later.
The build up to this Tour wasn't perfect, with one of the cars 'mods' not finished until 2 days before and without the chance for a proper shakedown - add in a closure of the M25 the night before departure and it was a relief to find all the runners at Eurotunnel on Tuesday!

There was the usual banter and anticipation as we boarded the train, fuelled with croissants ' tres continental' ( thanks Paul ) and washed down with a few cups of Java. On the 'other side' the skies were brightening and we headed West knocking off a chunk of time by using the motorways for an hour or so. All was well, Robs supercharged installation seemed to be running fine - with just an occasional concern over engine temps ( which turned out to be an iffy gauge) and we were starting to find some more interesting roads; until i started to have a misfire ( the car not me ).

Quick investigation showed that the plug for the coil pack was causing a misfire on 2+3, its handy having a sparks on Tour, within minutes Jay had sripped the wires and fashioned a solution. It worked! But for some reason under load the misfire returned, so i had to quickly adapt to feeding the power in and not just mashing the pedal to the floor. We stopped for lunch at a little airport just a short hop from Luxembourg and by then the sun was working its magic and T-Shirts were the order of the day.

Luxembourg....yeah you know the small grey boring place that you might whizz through looking for somewhere that's got a personality; the ugly bird that goes hand in hand with t he stunner. Nope, you haven't looked hard enough. Parts of this country are simply stunning, rock formations threaten from the side of the roads, little tunnels carved from that same rock contrasting with sweeping open country roads. Our path was taking us towards Trier in Germany, and a few 'clicks' beyond that we were looking for a tiny place on the Mosel called Riol - our home for the night.
1st hotel.JPG

A cracking hotel where we had cabins overlooking a sporting lake and which boasted its own 'Rodelbahn' - a summer rollercoaster. Well it would be rude not to have a go! Most of us took a high speed run on it - apparently braking is for wimps! A few 'cold ones' and grub at a pizzeria a short hop away would set us right for the next morning. Walking back to the Cabins we detoured to get closer to the a sound that was shattering the still of the night........the noisiest frogs that i've ever heard. Naturally 1 or 2 jokers decided to imitate the calls....Muppets ( d'ya get it, Muppets/Frogs - boom boom).

Wednesday.
The day would take us Southerly, taking in a load of lovely roads around the Mosel before taking a more direct ( yet back route ) to Stuttgart where we'd visit the Porsche museum. Ah the best laid plans - err not! Turned out that this years trip coincided with the German public holiday and today was the equivalent of 'the night before'.

Things didnt kick off too well either, as we managed to find about 3 road closures which messed up the ITN's and added time to the day. Lunch today was alongside the Rhone and if i say so rather nice sitting chatting in the sunshine.
day2.JPG

I mentioned traffic....well after lunch we should have had a straightforward run to the museum,...err no. Ze Germans had decided to pack their bags and leave work early and the short 40 miles of A roads were clogged, not even Barry and his Drain Buster could have unblocked that. We pottered along with the cars behaving themselves in the sweltering temps and decided to cut outr the museum ( well our group did)...and we headed for the twisties ahead of the Hotel. What a difference a few miles make!! Suddenly we were back in our stomping ground, and moving along quite nicely!! What a cracking Hotel in a sleepy village. I popped the bags in the room and found a few of the guys already getting served on the terrace - ah a couple of cold ones! Perfect. Gradually the others appeared - some with a tale of woe, after suffering the queues into Suttgart they'd arrived at the museum 10 mins late to find it closed. Doh!!
day2 lunch rhone.JPG

Rich arrived a little sheepish at the table to announce that he'd left a 'present' in the wrong room, talk about a beer spitting moment. The dry delivery ( the tale not the deed ) had me spluttering German hops all over the place. I can only imagine what the occupiers of the room made of teh strange smell when they returned! We cracked on with banter and tales over dinner at the Hotel and looked ahead to the following day.

Thursday.
We were going to a totally new part of the Forest and experiencing different roads and scenery - yes apparently ( Tony) there's some stunning scenery down there ! All was well with the world as sun cream was applied at regular intervals providing an excellent surface for dust and grim to adhere to. One of our party was mistaken for a refugee and i'm guessing his swarthy ( mucky ) looks and the rucksack caused some consternation in this quiet part of the world.
day3 coffee.JPG

day3 coffee waterfall.JPG

We arrived pretty much en-masse at coffee. A glorious setting. It was a small Hotel with Restaurant in the middle of nowhere with it's a crystal clear stream and stepped waterfalls outside. It was blissful sitting there with a cold drink watching the world go by. But soon it was time to saddle up as we headed for lunch -a Hotel atop one of the lower peaks where it seemed that Schnietzel was the order of the day. There was an option today to wimp out and cut a few miles from the end of the route - but being a hardy bunch no one was interested in THAT option! Instead we ended up at the 'Trike' place where a couple of us ventured last year. After a cool drink Phil fired up his drone and took some footage of the crew having a 'Savagely Awesome' run down the hill. Would they allow this in the UK - no way, Elf & Safety would have kittens!!
day3 lunch.JPG

We had a cracking run back towards the Hotel when 'oooh ooo' i heard a nasty screech ( and for once it wasn't Jay on the radio).....we pulled over and in the shade of a copse discovered that my alternator bracket was close to being a corpse. Dead.Defunct. No more. Frigging thing had sheered - but in typical 'on tour' fashion the guys rallied round and fashioned a makeshift fix; using a ratchet strap and my rollcage to pull the alternator into somewhat of a straight line. 'Take it easy' was teh suggestion.....bugger what did they mean ' try not to go more than around 4k too often'......great the coming days would have more kinks than a bdsm convention! Hey ho. After this interlude Richard found himself leading and a cracking job he did too as we headed back 'home' for sherberts.
day3 afternoon1.JPG

After a couple of cold ones someone suggested that kebabs and hookers would finish the night off - so a few of us headed off. Seems there was some misunderstanding as we ended up in a Shisha/Hookah bar....bloody english language is soooo ambiguous!

Friday.
Southern Forest. To those that know this is the Creme de la creme of the region. Words and pic's don;t really do it justice. We took an early coffee stop at a Hotel where Rob and Jay reverted to their childhood...
day4 morn coffee.JPG

We made for the highest restaurant which had simply stunning views, unfortunately they'd decided t empty their cesspit a bit earlier and the flies were also enjoying the view. Not detered Group One enjoyed some scran while Phil droned on and on -----taking footage which hopefully he'll share along the way. Group 2 arrived as we were leaving and we headed over and down some glorious twisties before snaking our way toward Titisee.
day4 b4 lunch 1.JPG

To those that don't know its a stunning lake that on a bank holiday weekend gets rammed, properly rammed - they also have an issue with a lack of parking signs. Still most of us managed to sort that problem out and have a wander watching the various boats enjoying the water. Sadly we were short of time so we missed out on the boat ride that we had in mind - settling instead ( well a few of us ) for an ice cream and a beer. Those that stayed that long cheated by taking a direct route back whilst Rich & Neil did the full route - fair play.
day4 b4 lunch mountains.JPG

day4  rob.JPG

Tonight ( i hope some has footage ) we played a game after dinner called speak out. It was truly hysterical , unfortunately it was a 'have to be there' - so words cannot describe the mirth around that table.

Saturday.
So today we'd head through some of the western most twisties before crossing into France and the Alsace, unfortunately the valley between the 2 counties is somewhat flat and uninspiring, but as you get closer you realise that the range of mountains that you have left behind have an evil twin ahead of you. And boy the roads of the high Alsace are evil. Hannibal Lector and Arnie rolled into one.....they'll bit you but leave you wanting to come back for more. Coffee and lunch were - bugger i need another word for stunning......stupendous? Both sited high on the peaks that they occupied, both looking back to our Black Forest playground. The 1st a Castle and the 2nd a 'working' Monastery - again we'd got split into 2 groups( not through fast driving i hasten to add). The 1st ( ours ) was leaving coffee as the rest rocked up and sadly ( for them) they didn't make the Monastery which was stunningly stupendous. A nice bit of tucker and 360 degree views over the treetops.
day5 towards bforest.JPG

day5 lunch.JPG

This afternoons roads gave a cracking contrast. We started off with a couple more hours of tight twisties which gradually led us to the lower Alsace and finally to the rolling farmland where the roads undulated and swept across the country. By a quirk i ended up 'solo' as did Paul after we lost the rest of our group at a fuel stop. I was sure they were ahead of me and 'pressed on', muttering that they must have pulled out all the stops to be so far ahead , and that it would have been nice to be 'in company' over such sweeping roads. In the end i stopped, called Rob and found that they were 35miles behind me.....ha ha. So i waited, and in doing so popped into a small Lidl for a cold drink.....no chance, the place was rammed. Instead i pottered out of Town and settled down to wait, snapping a few shots to stave off boredom as i sat in 33+ degrees.
day5 lunch 1.JPG


Reformed ( still Sans Paul ) we headed for the Hotel and arrived to find the pristine Caterham already berthed. Turned out that when i was in Lidl he'd passed me....and had gotten a 'tug' from teh Gendarmes as well. Phew, he told me where they'd been sitting and i know pretty much that they'd have 'had a word' if they'd still been there when i went through. As didn't have a 'gun' they decided to play the 'let's see all your docs and triangles etc.....hey ho, better than a fine!
day5 afternoon.JPG

Tonight as the last night it was 'quizzage'......we'd picked the only restaurant in Thionville that had space outside for 11.....and in hindsight we soon found out why. The owner was trying to single handedly serve about 10 tables and insisted on showboating along the way, placing glasses on top of each other with a 'Viola' - proud that he'd managed to serve 4 beers in 15 minutes. We caught on that we need to order 20 at a time, and that way we managed to keep full glasses through the meal. The quiz brought more than a few chuckles - even if the guys are catching on to the type of trick questions that the Captain poses. We decided to payback the owner by stacking a few glasses ourselves....humouring us he pronounced that 'hey if they fall and break alteast i won't have to wash them'....and being a showman/knob ( take your pick) he decided to add 1 more to the tower....he was right, we wouldn't have to wash quite a few of them, just have to clear up the broken mess!

Sunday.
we said au-revoir to Paul/Neil/Rich as they were heading back to Northern Germany for a track day.....except barring Felicity i think we all forgot to say goodbye!
Sorry chaps, we were keen to crack on ourselves.

Belgium, little grey country with crappy roads and beer? Nope, undulating roads with some great elevation changes. We had a couple of cheeky stops for suncream and leg stretching before taking a coffee in Fumay alongside a river. Phil got busy with his drone, showing off by taking it along the river and under the bridge before playing chicken with a boat that was pottering along minding its own business.

We knocked off a few miles on a motorway to get us upcountry, but not before we'd savoured more cracking little roads, dipping in and out of France and Belgium before winding up at a lakeside cafe near Calais for another ice cream. The tunnel was just 20 mins down the road and as we closed in the skies became cloudier as though saying ' that's it boys' you've had your fun now its back to reality. '

Handshakes, memories exchanged we headed down the M20 - another adventure over.
What did i learn?
Doesn't matter if there's 9 cars or 19 cars', its the people that drive them and that get involved with the banter that make these trips. I learned that in a few minutes its often possible to go from a state of anger and despair to one of 'whew joy' as guys rally round to sort a problem for one another. That more waypoints re needed to force 3 generations of tomtom to take exactly the same route. That Phil makes a good translator for Jay as i can't understand a frigging word he says over the radio. That Richard likes to leave his own log in strangers rooms. That 365 days is a bloody long time to wait for another Tour.....Thanks to all for the banter and the memories!
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day4 morn1.JPG
day4 morn.JPG
day4 b4 lunch.JPG

Dick
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Re: 2017 EU Captains Report.

Postby Dick » Mon May 29, 2017 2:43 pm

Sounds like a fun few days was had by all

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Larkingabout
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Re: 2017 EU Captains Report.

Postby Larkingabout » Mon May 29, 2017 3:01 pm

Sounds like a brilliant tour and a great report
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DJ.
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Re: 2017 EU Captains Report.

Postby DJ. » Mon May 29, 2017 6:59 pm

Sounds great, and good write up :D

At least this year, I don't have to be green with envy over your sunshine, as we got sun burned too!

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locost220
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Re: 2017 EU Captains Report.

Postby locost220 » Mon May 29, 2017 7:41 pm

Well said Mark. We and the cars made it through the long drive yesterday, few beers but no real tucker last night. Good nights sleep and short hope to the track day today. Sure Paul and Neil will share their thoughts of the track sometime. We have had a bit of issue all getting to the same place at once but finally sat in a restaurant in posh hotel about to order.
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SteveRST
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Re: 2017 EU Captains Report.

Postby SteveRST » Tue May 30, 2017 2:21 pm

Looks (and sounds) superb and weather spot on as per usual. Very jealous I missed out on this one! :x
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Rob E
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Re: 2017 EU Captains Report.

Postby Rob E » Tue May 30, 2017 3:27 pm

Well written up Mark, fantastic 6 days with some superb people made for an epic trip..... or is that awesome or savage??? Anyway, roll on 2018 only another year to wait..........
cheers for putting together suck a class adventure yet again.
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Nash
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Re: 2017 EU Captains Report.

Postby Nash » Tue May 30, 2017 8:20 pm

Great write up Mark. Just a quick note about day 7 which was Richard, Paul and myself doing a trackday at Blister Berg. I'll do a full trackday write up later but wanted to share a highlight of the journey to Germany again.

We stopped for coffee at the Mohne Dam. Made famous by its destruction by a bouncing bomb in WW2. dropped from a Lancaster Bomber. I found the visit a very moving experience. Not only because of its historical significance but also because it is so beautiful. It's both serine and powerful. Now that's a winning combination.
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Fury1630
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Re: 2017 EU Captains Report.

Postby Fury1630 » Tue May 30, 2017 9:15 pm

Neil - I fixed that picture for you. :)

Mohne.jpg
Mohne.jpg (62.9 KiB) Viewed 2725 times

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Crunchie Gears
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Re: 2017 EU Captains Report.

Postby Crunchie Gears » Tue May 30, 2017 11:13 pm

Fury1630 wrote:Neil - I fixed that picture for you. :)

Mohne.jpg


Too high Tony LOL


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